In a message dated 12/28/2001 10:34:17 AM Eastern Standard Time,
bstrobel(a)hotmail.com writes:
<< Wow, aren't you the rude one.
I, personally see no problem with this post. >>
At the risk of beginning a flame war .. which I do NOT want to do .. this
comment was inappropriate. This list is clearly defined as being for
genealogy research. As the ListPoppa .. it is Ron's job to make sure that we
stay on track. His post was not rude .. merely straight-forward and direct.
The other day, many of the lists were also hit with someone searching for
what was referred to as a "deadbeat dad", giving his name and family
information. That post was highly offensive to me as was this one. While I
can understand and emphathize with the angst and anguish these families are
dealing with .. these are delicate and private issues that can be very
hurtful if the information is used in the wrong way. It would be very easy
to slander someone and they would have no way of defending themselves in this
forum.
Adoption records have been sealed for a reason .. to protect both the
child and the adopting parents. Many states now have them opened up after a
certain time period. If someone is truly searching for a child who was
adopted .. they would register with many of the online search groups. I
found it offensive not only because of the privacy issue .. the off topic
issue .. but also because I truly believe that the accident of birth does not
necessarily make one a parent. The REAL mother to this child .. was the one
who raised her and loved her. I do not know the circumstances leading up to
the infant being given up .. and I'm certain that the birth mother did what
she felt she had to do at the time. It is not my place to criticize nor
condemn anyone for their life choices.
And it is not our place on this list to criticize the ListPoppa for his
decisions about how this list is run. There's a heck of a lot of time and
work that goes into establishing a list like this and keeping it running
smoothly. Personally, I think that Ron does a wonderful job for all of us,
and I support his decisions.
Maggie