Alright there! Very funny. You do realize my surname is Danforth!, And no, I don;t know
of anyone in the family making non-exploding lamp oil, although that sounds like my luck
with business ventures!
JimD (jim danforth)
Bud Burge wrote:
Subject: Fw: Actual epitaphs
Date: Mon, 10 May 1999 20:56:23 -0400
From: "Kathy Paul" <kpaul(a)mediawave.com>
To: "Pam Feix" <hannah(a)infinet.com>
CC: "joanne burge" <bburge(a)centuryinter.net>, "Carol"
<Cslstamper(a)aol.com>,
"Janet Brand" <jbmmlm(a)mediawave.com>, "Tabi"
<T_M_A_B(a)yahoo.com>
----- Original Message -----
From: Woodhead, Suzan <Woodhead_S(a)Ricerca.com>
To: Fowler, Fran <Fowler_F(a)Ricerca.com>; McMillan, Betsy
<McMillan_B(a)Ricerca.com>; Perz, Donna <Perz_D(a)Ricerca.com>; Backus, Patricia
(CRC) <Backus_P(a)CRcenter.com>; 'Dave Pellack'
<dpellack(a)indiana.edu>;
'Jacquie Soles' <jacquie2(a)mwweb.com>; 'Larry Smith'
<smithl(a)ameritech.net>;
'Pegg Smith' <psmith(a)usd250.k12.ks.us>; 'Polly Mertz'
<dmertz(a)UMSL.EDU>;
'Robin' <RERO103(a)Juno.com>; 'Sheryl' <duckie(a)ncweb.com>;
'Venie H'
<VenieH(a)aol.com>
Sent: Monday, May 10, 1999 10:12 AM
Subject: Actual epitaphs
> Actual epitaphs from gravestones ...
>
> On the grave of Ezekial Aikle in East Dollhouse Cemetery, Nova Scotia:
> Here lies
> Ezekial Aikle
> Age 102
> The Good
> Die Young.
>
> In a London, England cemetery:
> Ann Mann
> Here lies Ann Mann,
> Who lived an old maid
> But died an old Mann.
> Dec. 8, 1767
>
> In a Ribbesford, England, cemetery:
> Anna Wallace
> The children of Israel wanted bread
> And the Lord sent them manna,
> Old clerk Wallace wanted a wife,
> And the Devil sent him Anna.
>
> Playing with names in a Ruidoso, New Mexico, cemetery:
> Here lies
> Johnny Yeast
> Pardon me
> For not rising.
>
> Memory of an accident in a Uniontown, Pennsylvania cemetery:
> Here lies the body
> of Jonathan Blake
> Stepped on the gas
> Instead of the brake.
>
> In a Silver City, Nevada, cemetery:
> Here lays Butch,
> We planted him raw.
> He was quick on the trigger,
> But slow on the draw.
>
> A widow wrote this epitaph in a Vermont cemetery:
> Sacred to the memory of
> my husband John Barnes
> who died January 3, 1803
> His comely young widow, aged 23, has
> many qualifications of a good wife, and
> yearns to be comforted.
> (ed: guess they did not have personnal ads then)
>
> A lawyer's epitaph in England:
> Sir John Strange
> Here lies an honest lawyer,
> And that is Strange.
>
> Someone determined to be anonymous in Stowe, Vermont:
> I was somebody.
> Who, is no business
> Of yours.
>
> Lester Moore was a Wells, Fargo Co. station agent for Naco, Arizona in the
> cowboy days of the 1880's. He's buried in the Boot Hill Cemetry in
> Tombtone, Arizona:
> Here lies Lester Moore
> Four slugs from a .44
> No Les No More.
>
> In a Georgia cemetery:
> "I told you I was sick!"
>
> John Penny's epitaph in the Wimborne, England, cemetery:
> Reader if cash thou art
> In want of any
> Dig 4 feet deep
> And thou wilt find a Penny.
>
> On Margaret Daniels grave at Hollywood Cemetery Richmond, Virginia:
> She always said her feet were killing her
> but nobody believed her.
>
> In a cemetery in Hartscombe, England:
> On the 22nd of June
> - Jonathan Fiddle -
> Went out of tune.
>
> Anna Hopewell's grave in Enosburg Falls, Vermont has an epitaph that
sounds
> like something from a Three Stooges movie:
> Here lies the body of our Anna
> Done to death by a banana
> It wasn't the fruit that laid her low
> But the skin of the thing that made her go.
>
> More fun with names with Owen Moore in Battersea, London, England:
> Gone away
> Owin' more
> Than he could pay.
>
> Someone in Winslow, Maine didn't like Mr. Wood:
> In Memory of Beza Wood
> Departed this life
> Nov. 2, 1837
> Aged 45 yrs.
> Here lies one Wood
> Enclosed in wood
> One Wood
> Within another.
> The outer wood
> Is very good:
> We cannot praise
> The other.
>
> On a grave from the 1880's in Nantucket, Massachusetts:
> Under the sod and under the trees
> Lies the body of Jonathan Pease.
> He is not here, there's only the pod:
> Pease shelled out and went to God.
>
> The grave of Ellen Shannon in Girard, Pennsylvania is almost a consumer
tip:
> Who was fatally burned
> March 21, 1870
> by the explosion of a lamp
> filled with "R.E. Danforth's
> Non-Explosive Burning Fluid"
>
> Oops! Harry Edsel Smith of Albany, New York:
> Born 1903--Died 1942
> Looked up the elevator shaft to see if
> the car was on the way down. It was.
>
> In a Thurmont, Maryland, cemetery:
> Here lies an Atheist
> All dressed up
> And no place to go.
>
> In a cemetary in England:
> Remember man, as you walk by,
> As you are now, so once was I,
> As I am now, so shal you be,
> Remember this and follow me.
>
> To which someone replied by writing on the tombstome:
>
> To follow you I'll not consent,
> Until I know which way you went.
>
>
> Submitted by: Chet Rock @
aol.com
>
>
>
>
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